Me: Childzilla was going on and on about fairies so Nana bought her a generic fairy doll
Himself: *patient look*
Me: It looks like reject Barbie and is shedding glitter everywhere and has a bodice and petal skirt and a g-string thong on for some reason
Me: When Childzilla’s first job is as an exotic dancer called Sparkles we know what happened
Himself: *patient but slightly strained look*
Me: Anyway, Childzilla wanted a name for it
Himself: *enquiring look*
Me: And the only one I could think of was Twunterbell
Himself: At least it didn’t start with C
Me: Oh, it did, but I changed it
Me: So fairy is now called Billie
Me: Because she looks like Billie Piper
Himself: *mild approval*
Me: After half a bag of coke*
…I am really not sure who thought it was a good idea to leave me in charge of a child. And the dog. Or anything really.
*Have a listen to Horse Outside by the Rubberbandits. Partly as it might illuminate the joke but mainly because I like it.